This day may be all about you and your fiancé, but that doesn’t mean that you want to be rude and not take into account what is important to other people. But when the parents, grandparents, and even others, try to force their will into things and don’t listen to what you want in a wedding, it can cause some problems.
The best way to handle this is to pick your battles. If you aren’t too concerned about what the invitations look like, but your mother-in-law really wants something fancy, then let her choose them out. No one is going to be bothered by that. If you are lost on what to do for centerpieces, go with that crazy idea that your fiancé has. There are so many details to a wedding to start with, so why fight over all the little things.
Who is Supposed to Pay for What?
You need to sit down and discuss the finances of the wedding from the beginning to ensure everyone is on the same page. Traditionally, the bride’s family would take the wedding expenses and the groom’s parents would do the rehearsal. But times have changed. Many couples are older now and pay for their own weddings to keep the burden off their parents and to have more control. And it is possible that your parents may have no plans to pay for it or aren’t able to afford it.
Sit down with your partner and see where the finances will come from. You can also sit down with each set of parents and see what they are comfortable with as well. Once you have some of the numbers from both parents, you can then have a good idea of how much you are willing to spend for the wedding as well. This gives you a good place to start.
It is never a good idea to get started planning on the wedding and assume that your parents, or the brides, will pay for it all. You may get a rude awakening later when you find out that the number is much smaller than you anticipated, or if they won’t pay for any of it. On the other hand, you and your fiancé may assume you will pay for it all, and cause some hurt feelings when one or both sets of parents want to help. This is why open communication about finances from the start is important.
Bad Guest Requests for Music
Do you know your uncle is going to come and ask for that inappropriate song during the reception and you are worried about how to handle the issue? You could talk to them upfront and let them know you don’t appreciate that song, but this isn’t always a guarantee that things will get fixed. In this case, you may want to have a discussion with your DJ ahead of time.
Let them know whether you want guests to give suggestions in the first place. Most couples do this to make sure there is a steady stream of music and that everyone will have a good time. You can also fill out a form of all songs that you absolutely refuse to have played during the wedding. Fill this out with some of the songs that you want avoided at all costs. This list is just as important as your must play list too.